ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  Yakima Canutt on Wed May 01, 2013 12:06 am

And what happened to Sagdeev? Transformed into one of the Choctaw Unsullied, at the Oriental Apothecary or what have u?

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Wed May 01, 2013 1:06 am

How soon we forget. Rolling Eyes
Sagdeev made a clean getaway and then married Julie Eisenhower--everybody knows that.

pinhedz wrote:Woo asks Franco:

Woo -- "Where do you know this evil-doer from?"

Franco -- "From many international conferences over the past 5 decades. I know him as a man who cannot be tricked and cannot be intimidated ... "

Sagdeev -- "But can be bought?"

Franco -- "Indeed."

Sagdeev -- "And I know you as a man that the Americans tried to buy in 1939, but they failed."

Franco -- "I had other plans."

Sagdeev -- "So can you be tricked?"

Franco -- "If I was tricked, how would I know?"

Sagdeev -- "I'll answer for you--you cannot be tricked."

Franco -- "Whatever you say."

Sagdeev -- "But can you be intimidated?"

Franco -- "At my age? What could you threaten me with?"

Sagdeev -- "I'll answer for you: you can't be intimidated."

--- pause ---

Sagdeev -- "So, in short, we have no basis for negotiation."

Franco -- "None that I can see. But I wonder if it is still the case that you cannot be intimidated?"

With that, Franco pulled Mack's pistol out from under his belt.

Sagdeev -- "Intimidate me with a gun? All your life you avoid violence, and now you have a weapon? I don't believe you could hit the broad side of a barn at 10 meters!" Razz

Franco -- "Oh, I would not shoot you. I wouldn't even think of it. But right in front of me is the nuclear device that will drive the nuclear-pumped laser."

Franco holds the barrel of the pistol against the waist of the housing:

Franco -- "Where is the center of the device? Right about here?" Cool

Sagdeev -- "I don't doubt that you will find the right location if you open the maintenance hatch."

Franco -- "Yes, that's what I was about to do when these guests arrived."

Sagdeev -- "And I remember now that I was about to leave when they arrived. So, if you'll excuse me, I'm late for a previous engagement."

Sagdeev hurriedly climbed into his motorboat, started the engine and departed at full speed.

Franco -- "I'd almost say that he was intimidated." Razz

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Wed May 01, 2013 1:26 am

user wrote:
Vasily wrote: А кто, он за тобой, или ты за ним ухлёстываешь?

That is typical Vasily. Rolling Eyes
Ever since he took up with Amanda, he keeps asking: "Was he hitting on you, or were you hitting on him?" Suspect

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  Yakima Canutt on Wed May 01, 2013 3:14 am

In that putrid tungsten mine, the only dance Mojangles could muster was a faint, delirious twitching as Uzi oddly arranged the pornographic Serbian playing cards won from Johnny Behan at the last Thunderdome Invitational. Sauntering into the dankness with a maddeningly deliberate gait, Snarington locked his goggles on Uzi and belched,

"30 days to brand Sagdeev or 30 days back to Yoooma. You're my Judas-goat-ceviche-bitch, Mr. Uzi."

Uzi began 'beat-boxing' in the style of a Roland-909 and utilized Tuvan techniques to pose a query simultaneously.

"Tell me, Mr. Snarington. How does it feel to be so gosh darn right?"

"Not bad, actually."


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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Wed May 08, 2013 7:54 am

user wrote:"Tell me, Mr. Snarington. How does it feel ...?"

"Not bad, actually."

Snarington was trying to play it cool, but his distressed look betrayed his true state of mind.


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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Wed May 08, 2013 7:56 am

Yes, Uzi was locked up with some very unsavory characters. Neutral

Mr. "Snarington" (not his real name, of course), after the failure of his carnival show in Montana, had been arrested in Paso Robles for impersonating a US Marshall. Shocked

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Wed May 08, 2013 8:10 am

Meanwhile, Ned was just moseyin' down the road toward the jailhouse. Just moseyin' and a'pickin'.

He'd mosey a bit, and then pick a bit, and then mosey some more.

Ned ain't much of a picker, but what he lacks in technique, he makes up in sincerity.


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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Wed May 08, 2013 8:13 am

As he often did while he was moseyin' Ned made up a little song:

"Well my name it means nothing, my age it means less,
The town that i come from is Paso Rob-les,
My fight is for justice, my quest is for truth,
And I'll fight just as long as I'm still on the loose."

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Wed May 08, 2013 8:15 am

You see, Ned was not just a convenience-store clerk that liked to pick on the side.

He was a crusader for righteous causes. A friend of the oppressed and the wronged. bounce

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Fri May 10, 2013 4:38 am

pinhedz wrote:As he often did while he was moseyin' Ned made up a little song:

"Well my name it means nothing, my age it means less,
The town that i come from is Paso Rob-les,
My fight is for justice, my quest is for truth,
And I'll fight just as long as I'm still on the loose."

"Uzi was a thinker whose thinking was free,
He didn't ask for answers from you or from me,
He used his own wit to succeed or to fail,
His re-ward is the Pa-so Robles jail."

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  felix on Sun May 12, 2013 12:01 pm

Lonnie was surely thinkin bout Uzi McHound O'fishes when he sang bout Ft Worth Jail (intro'd by old mate & band boss Chris B.)


(Them Kingston Trio types sang bout Tijuana Jail:


but was this alll a bad man's blunder?)

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Wed May 15, 2013 4:30 am

Ned was not one to spring into action without careful consideration. He set hisself down in front of the jailhouse and finished his set list, including "Folson Prison," and "San Quentin," "Bad Man's Blunder," "Fort Worth Jail," Tijuana Jail," and that old Grand Marais favorite "Cook County Jail."

None of this entertainment was helping to improve the morale of the miserable Paso Robles inmates.

Snarington finally lost his patience and shouted out "If you want to help the wronged and the oppressed, you might consider stopping that infernal caterwauling and lifting a finger to get us out of here!"



Ned was not offended by the "caterwauling" comment (he was used to that). But neither did he share Snarington's sense of urgency:

Ned -- "I reckon you'd be makin' it first priority to bust me out if the shoe was on the other foot, wouldn'cha?"


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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Sun May 19, 2013 3:20 am

Yes, Ned was takin' his own sweet time (just like the story teller here Razz ).

He finally ran out of prison ballads and stepped up to the little window and peered between the bars:

Ned -- "Kind'a dark in there, ain't it"

Snarington -- "Is there something you want?" Mad

Ned -- "Everybody doin' alright?"

Snarington -- "What does it look like to you?"

Ned -- "Anything I can get for y'all? Something to read or some sassafras?"

Uzi Rasetti -- "We can't read very well in here. Perhaps you could find us a nice Montepulciano?" What a Face

Ned -- "Is that some kind of pulled pork?"

Uzi -- "Red wine? any kind of red wine?" Neutral

Ned -- "It's easier to find rot gut whiskey."
Snarington -- "What we really need is for you to help us get out of here, you silly twit!"

Ned -- "You know, you remind me of when that big politico came here from 'Frisco and everybody was calling him names. He said 'It's interesting that you seem to want to alienate the decision-makers in this process. ' "

Snarington -- "I do beg your pardon. I meant to say 'Is there any way you might be able to help us out of our confinement, My Good Sir.' " Neutral

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Tue May 21, 2013 2:00 pm

Ned -- "Well, gents, I reckon that I should help you out of there, because for you to have turned out so bad I reckon the system must have failed you, and it's a grievous injustice for society to be punishing you like this."

Snarington -- "Hear, hear!" What a Face

Ned -- "But you know, it's like the lady said, "Everybody must give something back
For something they get."

Snarington -- "groan" Suspect

Ned -- "Don't get cute." bounce

Uzi Rasetti -- "Is there something you want from us?"

Ned -- "I mean to head off an injustice. There's a man on the run, and he ain't been known to hurt an honest man. The sheriff just don't like him to be so free. Someone needs to come to his aid, and we're the ones to do it."

Snarington -- "Suppose we choose not to help you."

Ned -- "You might not eat for awhile. I gave the sheriff in Paso Robles enough rotgut whiskey to forget about you for at least a month."

Uzi -- "It might be a better choice for us to help him, Mr. Snarington." Neutral

Snarington -- "very well, since it's a courageous and noble act he is taking on. A far, far better thing … and all that."

Ned -- "So. Let's see about this door. Do any of you know the combination to this lock?" scratch

Uzi and Snarington -- "It has a combination?" Shocked

Ned -- "I reckon I'll just try all the combinations until I find the one that works." geek

Uzi -- "That could take some time. With 100 numbers on the lock, the number of possible combinations of 3 numbers is 10 to the 3rd power. So, unless we are very lucky, you will be trying combinations for several lifetimes."

Ned -- "Well ain't that the rotten break. I just feel real broken up for you unfortunates, that's all I got to say." Crying or Very sad

Then Ned laughed long and hard: Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

Ned -- "I was just funnin' with ya. All they got on this door is a little latch like on your garden gate. Razz

And Ned flung the door wide open. The prisoners were very glad to step out into the fresh night air. By the moonlight, they saw what Ned had brought with him:

Ned -- "I brought my crusader suit for the occasion, because the sheriff looked liked like he had his mind made up and his gun loaded."

There was the iron helmet, breastplate and apron from the general store.

Snarington -- "You're not planning to wear the whole thing, are you?"

Ned -- "It fits me best--it was tailor made." Cool

Snarington -- "But that would be selfish. At least let me wear the apron, my manhood could be facing imminent peril." bounce

Ned -- "Alright--but I want it back." Suspect

Uzi Rasetti -- "Can I wear the helmet? I have some budding ideas in my head that I hope not to lose."

Ned -- "Alright, you foreign bib. Your noggin is protected. I'll keep the vest so that my heart of gold and love for my fellow man will make it through the night."

Uzi -- "Between the three of us, we cannot be tricked, we cannot be intimidated, and we cannot be bought." Very Happy

Snarington -- "Here, here!"

Uzi -- "Where, where?" geek

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Wed May 22, 2013 1:18 am

pinhedz wrote:Uzi -- "Where, where?" geek
Snarington -- "Yes, please tell us, fearless leader, where are you taking us."

Ned -- "To a party. At the piano man's house."

Snarington -- "At 4:00 in the morning?"

Ned -- "Time don't mean a thing at piano man's parties."

Snarington -- "Surely you don't mean Paderewski." Shocked

Ned -- "Is that how you pronounce it?" scratch

Snarington -- "Are we invited?" Suspect

Ned -- "Are our guns loaded?"

Uzi -- "Of course. No one would come to Paso Robles without their guns loaded."

Ned -- "That helps with the door man." What a Face

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Sun May 26, 2013 11:21 am

Meanwhile, back at the Paderewski estate, the party goers were oblivious that a contingent of the liberation-movement was heading their way.

Mack was on the verge of making his move:

pinhedz wrote:Mack sidled up to Pinhead, looking for the telltale bulge of a Colt 1911 under his jacket. Suspect

Mack (innocently) -- "That there dancing girl--ain't she just the prettiest thing?" Cool

Pinhead -- "Yes, but what I find more remarkable is her mastery of her art."

Mack -- "Mastery of her art, eh? I reckon you must me one of them edjicated eastern fellers."

Pinhead was still too drunk to recognize the artful craftiness in Mack's "innocent" curiousity. drunken

Pinhead -- "Yes, I come from the eastern part of the country, and I've always been interested in music and the arts."

Mack -- "That's what I figured. What did you say your name was?

Pinhead -- "Wack … Paddock. My name is Ignatius Paddock."

Mack -- "Pleased to meet'cha Mr. Paddock. My name's Ma … George."
Suddenly Pinhead sensed danger, and drew his Colt 1911, but Mack had already drawn his Colt 1912.

The rest of the guests gasped as the firearms came out (some of the 19th-century females even screamed and fainted), and they all moved back against the walls.

Pinhead -- "I see you have a Colt 1912."

Mack -- "Yer dern tootin'! Most advanced trigger mechanism on the market!"

Pinhead -- "Have you tried it out?"

Mack -- "Not yet--you lookin' to be first?"

Pinhead -- "I designed the trigger mechanism." Cool

Mack's bluster dropped down a notch:

Mack -- "I reckon you did. And now this is the firearm that's bringin' you to justice." bounce

Pinhead -- "I had already been cheated by the Colt company when I designed that mechanism. It was my parting gift."

Mack -- "You saying' that this piece ain't quality work?" Suspect

Pinhead -- "I'm saying that if you pull that trigger and I ain't dead after you do--then you're dead."

Mack -- "I seen many a poker player pretendin' to have cards in their hand that weren't there. I say yur bluffin!"

Pinead -- "Maybe I is and maybe I ain't. So what you have to ask yourself is 'Do I feel lucky?' "

[…pause…]

Pinhead -- "Well, do ya, punk?" Razz


Last edited by pinhedz on Mon May 27, 2013 10:13 am; edited 1 time in total

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Mon May 27, 2013 7:17 am

The fateful instant of the fateful moment of the fateful day is at hand. affraid


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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Fri May 31, 2013 11:49 am

It was, of course at that very moment when Ned kicked down the door. affraid

[It wasn't actually locked, but Ned kicked it, and it sort of swung upon]

Uzi and Snarington stepped into the hall right behind Ned with pistols drawn:


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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Fri May 31, 2013 11:50 am






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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Sun Jun 02, 2013 12:20 pm

pinhedz wrote:
8 of the female party guests had their guns pointed right at Mack's head (they were all sweet on Pinhead, I reckon). Shocked

Mack decided it might be ill advised to shoot Pinhead without coming to some kind of accommodation with the pistol packing ladies. Suspect

Mack -- "May I have your attention. Please be advised that I am a bonded US marshal, and this man is wanted for a felonious felony! I am authorized to place him under arrest, or plug him six times and haul him to the authorities to collect the reward if the occasion calls for it!" bounce

Ned -- "He ain't done nuthin' but take back the ill-gotten gains stolen by corporate banditos! Some rob you with a gun, and some rob you with a fountain pen--Woody Guthrie said that!"

Mack was a bit taken aback by that, having always been a big fan of Woody Guthrie."

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Sun Jun 09, 2013 3:28 am

This is very tense. Neutral

All it would take would be for one of those drunken yahoos to pull the trigger, and we'll have a Quentin Tarantino bloodbath. affraid

And it was at that very moment that a new arrival stepped through the doorway behind Ned and his Merry Band of Outlaws.

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Sun Jun 09, 2013 3:34 am

Yes--SpecialMan arrived just in a nick of time to save the day. cheers


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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Fri Jun 14, 2013 11:03 am

I know what you are all thinking.

Is it wise for Blue Moon to be chewing bubble gum during a Mexican standoff?Shocked

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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Fri Jun 14, 2013 11:04 am

The short answer is "NO--it is not."bounce


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Re: ATU--The Movie, EPISODE I (with epilogue part 1 and 2) -- and EPISODE II -- and EPISODE III -- and EPISODE IV -- and EPISODE V -- and EPISODE VI

Post  pinhedz on Fri Jun 14, 2013 11:07 am

BANG! affraid

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